Blah...

I'm feeling emotional...

The last few months have been all about change - sometimes change is good, but its almost always initially hard. And I'm not one to really enjoy change. Don't get me wrong - I love my life and I'm so happy. Adjustment has just been so much harder than I anticipated. Its funny really... You think everything through... You calculate everything over and over in your head... You weigh everything out... You discuss everything endlessly... And you make a decision. Then afterwards you realize that you really had no idea what you should actually be thinking... calculating... weighing... discussing...! The decision was made and you are happy ...just shocked. :) Becoming parents has brought us both such a mixture of emotions and feelings. We've been happy and sad, angry and elated, excited and discouraged, frustrated and over-joyed. Emotions are one thing you can never plan for! Don't get me wrong - we are so happy to have little Abi. I'm just taking a minute to put down some of my thoughts from the last couple months.

Now its time to adjust again... I have to go back to work. I'm only going back part time for which I am so grateful! I don't have to worry about Abi because she'll be with Kris. I've thought about it, and I think that even if I didn't have to go back to work, I'd still want to work just a little. I think that I'd miss it. Plus it gives me a little chance to "get out" and see other humans. I think the thing I'm most upset about it the time it will take away from my Honey. That has been by far the hardest adjustment for me since having Abi - us not being able to spend time alone together. Now it will get even a little bit harder. I feel like an ungrateful wretch for even saying this (seeing as I'm only working 2 shifts per week)... I'm happy to be able to work it out that Abi doesn't have to be in day-care, but that means me working every other weekend and one evening a week - all shifts that I've never liked to work.

Soon I will stop being emotional and give myself a good strong kick in the pants... but maybe I will have a good cry first.

Naps...

Abi has been sleeping through the night like a champ for 3 weeks now - awesome! However naps have been a different story - she sleeps for 20-40 minutes and is awake and won't go back to sleep! I've wanted to try having her sleep on her tummy and see if she does better, but I've been too nervous. All the "experts" saying 'don't do it!!!' scared me... even though I know that we all slept on our stomachs and lived! :) Well, we got back from Mich last night and today I decided to let her sleep on her tummy. Actually - I put her down for her nap on her back and she slept for about 40 minutes and didn't look like she had any plans of going back to sleep! Well - I rolled her over and she cried for a while and fell back to sleep. I had to wake her up 2 1/2 hours later!! I was so surprised! We'll have to wait and see if it keeps working. P.S. I've been in to check on her at least every 10 minutes! :)

Ty and Beth :)

My handsome brother Ty and my beautiful sister-in-law Beth are finally married! Don't they look awesome?!!! Kris, Abi and I traveled to Cadillac, Michigan Thursday through Sunday. We met up with Aaron and Melissa and Mercy at the airport and what a sweet ride we rented! Ford Crown Vic - we were riding in style! :) Abi was so good on all the flights but didn't like the 1 3/4 hr. car ride from Grand Rapids to Cadillac very much. Can't complain at all thought - she was so good all week end and even slept like a champ at the hotel!

I'm so happy for Ty and Beth! We've been looking forward to their wedding for a long time and I know that they will be happy together. They're good for each other. If only they were going to live a little closer! Florida is too far away.... ....next year to NY??!! Maybe... :) I do so hope that we can vacation together one more time next summer!

There will be more pictures to come, but I just wanted to post one for now. The wedding was beautiful and everything went pretty smoothly I think.

Wow!

I neglected to mention this:

Abi started sleeping thought the night a week ago (July 29th) at 8 weeks old!!

Kris and I took a parenting class at church before she was born that guaranteed that if we did things a certain way she'd be sleeping through the night 8 hours by 8 weeks and 12 hours by 12 weeks... Hmmm... we tore our hair out with a VERY fussy baby for about 5-6 weeks thinking that absolutely nothing was working. Then all of a sudden on a beautiful Wednesday morning - I woke up at 6am and realized that it was light outside and I hadn't gotten up during the night! Abi had slept 9 1/2 hours. And she's done it faithfully every night since! We still have a little trouble getting her to fall asleep, but I'm not complaining! Oh, what beautiful nights!!!

More Abigail pics :)

How sweet is this picture? :) I love it! I think that Abi is starting to recognize our faces. So far Kris and I are the only ones that get those adorable big smiles. She doesn't mind anyone else, but she just stares at them...
Lately Abi's happiest time are laying on her back on the living room floor! She's smiling more and more and starting to coo. It's just way to cute - she gets so excited!

Bath time! Gotta love a towel with a crown - she's our little princess...! She loves the bath, but really isn't too fond of the towel and dry off time.

My little lady was 2 months old already on August 2nd! I can't believe how fast the time is flying by already! These are her 2 month shots below - with my most favorite dress of hers.

And now, poor Abi is tired - so many pictures - I need to sleep now...

I guess that my blog has become an "Abigail picture place." :) There are just too many that are just too cute in my opinion! Besides I can't believe how the time is flying and how big she's getting... before I know it she'll be all grown up and I'll be sad! She went for her 2 month check up on Monday - complete with 3 shots and an oral vaccine. That was all heartbreaking to watch. Why must they make the mothers hold them in place while they're being tortured? I almost cried! She did fine though, and calmed down pretty quickly. I think they kind of messed her up for a couple days though. She had so much trouble getting any sleep during the day for the last 2 days. I was worried that she was constipated - highly unusual for her not to go for 2 days - but that fear was resolved last night. Sorry Honey, I know you had fun taking that poo bath! I'm glad it wasn't me this time! :)

We've been working on getting little Abi used to a bottle - its been rough, but I think that she's finally getting better at it! I have to go back to work in 2 1/2 weeks - ugh. I have mixed feelings on that front. I'm nervous for one - I think that I forgot everything! I'm very grateful that I have the opportunity to go per-diam so I'll only be working 2 shifts per week, but still I'll miss being home with Kris when he's home. I guess it'll be good to get out of the house and all. Honestly - I think I'd miss it if I never went back to work - good thing I don't have a choice. I'm just selfish and want to be able to have all my time with my Honey and my Babe...

Next weekend is Ty and Beth's wedding (Aug 16th) in Michigan. We fly out on Thursday. I hope that all goes smoothly with the baby. I'm a little nervous about taking her on the plane and about trying to get her to sleep while we're there... I'm praying that all goes smoothly. I've been making lists in my head all week of all the things that I need to pack! Wow - its so different to try to travel with a little one than it was with just the 2 of us! I'm sure I'll forget something important! Its unbelievable how much stuff is required for a little baby!

Too cute...

Just had to post this most adorable picture that I took with my phone today! She woke up from her second nap in such a happy mood. She lay on the floor cooing and smiling for half an hour. It was my favoritest time with her so far!!! I love you Babe. :)

Shock!

Just thought I'd put a little note of my shock in here... Abi slept 9 hours last night. She hasn't gone more that 5 in a couple weeks and I was getting discouraged again. It was funny - I woke up at 2:30 when she usually does and was so surprised that all was quiet! I lay in bed just waiting for her to wake up and she never did till 6am!

Last week she finally started to get onto somewhat of a schedule - what a relief! She started sleeping better for naps and consequently being a much happier babe. Then over the weekend I was in Statia's wedding and that threw everything for a loop! :) I had the rehearsal on Friday, but she was OK that evening. The wedding was an evening wedding with the reception on the Captain JP Cruise. It was lovely, but being on the boat for 4 hours where it was noisy got her overstimulated and all messed up - plus she was about 2 hours late for her bedtime. Its funny really - she did so well all that day, but I was so stressed worrying about what it would do to her! (Statia - if you're reading this I'm not complaining - just journaling... :) It was a lovely wedding!) Anyway - little Abigail was all messed up for a couple days, but she's getting beautifully back on track. I'm amazed at how much of a happier baby she is when she naps well - its incredible. Now - hopefully she'll sleep well again tonight!

On a side note, Kris is practicing to run a 5K at the end of Sept. I think that just about everyone else I know is running now too... Starts to make me think that I want to - may be a good way to loose weight! I was 185 when Abi was born and I'm down to 160 now... But I have been for about a month. I have 25 lbs to go to be where I want to be (only 15 to be down to pre-pregnancy weight). Seems hard to get there, but I want to very much. I don't think I'm a runner, but Kris went running tonight and it seemed like fun... we'll see. I think that I'll have to get about 3 heavy-duty sports bras and layer them up... Hmmm...

My baby screameth...

Took us a few days to get it between crying episodes, but we were able to get Abi's 1 month picture. (It's a couple weeks old now, but I'm just getting to post it...)


Abi loves her bath - this seems to be one thing that keeps her happy even in the middle of her cranky periods!

Just a couple of pictures that I thought were very cute! Gotta love the double chin in the first pic! I think its such a cute pic. And of course an adorable one of Abi and Dad...

A few good nights.

Tuesday night - 7 hours.
Wednesday night - 5 hours.
Thursday night - 6 hours.

Today I'm happy - feeling a little encouraged! I hope that we're on to something - but I'm sure we'll still have some less than perfect nights. Now, if only I could get her to nap during the day! I guess we'll just have to keep working on that!

On a side note - I think she's been much less fussy for the last couple days to. I hesitate to say that too soon. But, maybe sleeping better at night is making her less fussy... We shall see...

Happy Day...

See - I knew that Abi could sleep at least 5 hours at night! ...She's done it! ...Once. She can have one good night and then usually a couple very bad sleepless nights. This past weekend was particularly rough. Friday night she was awake from 1am till 5:30am and we were exhausted. She slept ok the next night - then Sunday night she was again awake from 1am till 6am. That night I was exhausted. I don't want Kris to be up with her on days he has to work. Monday morning I was crying... Thank God my mom came over and watched her so I could take a nap! Then Linea came over Tues. so I could clean my house - hadn't done that since the morning before Abi was born! Thank you both for your help!



Its so frustrating knowing that she can sleep - she just won't. And I have such a hard time getting her to take any naps! She'll fall asleep in my arms, but the second I set her down she is wide awake and screaming. During the day the best I can get is usually 20 min cat-naps. Ugh... So, needless to say the last few weeks have been very rough and frustrating. Last night - we had a miracle...



Abi slept 7 hours!!!


I'm holding my breath for tonight. My fingers are crossed. I'm praying for another miracle.